Our new critic, Upperstall’s flyingrodent heroically volunteered to review YRF’s latest Pyaar Impossible. Five minutes into the movie he called me and after a bucketful of incomprehensible insults, stated that he’s going to be continually texting me through the film. It seemed I had to endure it as well.

Except for some cussword starring and [...]

After whacking my brain left, right and center, the other day I decided that I would become Dadasaheb Phalke in my previous birth. Why not? I may not have introduced cinema into India, but like Phalke sir, I too had carried a projector to show my films in Indian villages. At some point in his [...]

The story so far :
Cubbu is going to ‘phoren’. Cubbu needs CHARACTER CERTIFICATES from the Mumbai police. Cubbu has been handed over three sealed envelopes by the Department of Character certificates at the police HQ. Now the onus is on Cubbu to take these three envelopes to three police [...]

On the eve of the Deepavali festival, I had to urgently send a couple of DVD copies of a film of mine to a Film Festival. At the government post office that I normally frequent, out of the two multi purpose counters where one could register posts, only one was operational. The second one was [...]

Mr. RHTLLAW (real hair that looks like a wig), is possibly the most Chinese looking Maharashtrian police clerk in the ‘Foreigners Registration Department’ at the CID office, Crawford Market. Put a small fake mole on Costable Kakodkar’s cheek. Stick a few strands of white hair on his chin. Give him a cigarette holder. [...]

How often do you come across articles and vignettes of conversations with cabbies? A lot. Once a week at least, and if you are the sort who scans all editions of all newspapers plus the internet for stories, probably five times a day. Editors love this. But then so do greenhorn literati. Somehow for most [...]

The worst thing you can do to a girl is saddle her with a sister early on in life. The sister is always going to be more beautiful or more intelligent or more virtuous or more cheerful or more obedient or wear better hats - none of which helps in the making of the confident, [...]

Once upon a time, many years back, I had made a short film that was budgeted to around three hundred rupees - the then cost of a digital video tape. The shooting location was my ex-180 square foot house and my camera assistant was a crumpled Sony PD 150 manual.  
There was a struggling actor living close [...]

The Udupi restaurant near the railway station was surprisingly quite empty. I had with me my new glasses. But before I could have a ‘first day-first show’ look at it, the waiter waived a menu card at me. ‘Idli Sambaar’ was a big bore and quickies like ‘Upma’ and ‘Shira’ were out of stock. Before [...]

As the last shot of the film ran through the sound studio projector, the three minute flute piece for the yet to be done end titles, had already begun. The re-recordist’s fingers were alert, ready on the faders and my sound designer gave a smiley sigh of relief. The mixing of my children’s film was [...]